Being an event that is solemn in nature, as a way to respect those closest to the deceased, there are some rules to follow for good funeral etiquette. Here are eight things to think about before attending a service.
1. Consider your outfit
Back in the day, people would wear black to funerals. You don’t have to, but if you can’t pick an outfit, dark colours are a safe bet. Don’t wear something so eye-catching and bold that it distracts from the reason for the event. You can also think about the culture and what they would traditionally wear.
2. Think before sitting
The front pews or seats are reserved for the family and people close to the deceased, so don’t occupy those. But, don’t sit ALL the way at the back, either. Fill up seats around them – you don’t want the grieving family to feel isolated, and this is a silent but powerful way to show them support.
3. Stand for the casket
If there is a casket, it will be taken out of the venue at the end of the service to transport it to the burial ground. Sometimes, it is also brought in at the start of the funeral. In both these instances, it’s polite to stand. This is a way to show your respect for the dead and their loved ones.
4. Embrace the unfamiliar
Is the person who has passed away from a different culture than yours? Or maybe they practised a different religion? Be respectful of this and follow the protocol of the day. The same goes for the food. At 21st Century Funeral Services, we offer funeral catering services to feed your guests.
5. Prepare things to say
Only those closest to the person will possibly make speeches. You do, however, need to greet and give your condolences to those people. Before you go, prepare a few comforting and loving things you can say to the bereaved if you are worried about it being awkward when you see them.
6. Turn off your phone
There are few things worse or more disrespectful than a phone ringing or pinging in a funeral service. It is extremely distracting and disruptive, so make sure yours is turned off. It is also in very poor taste to take pictures of the deceased, family or attendants and to post them to social media. Don’t do it!
7. Brief children before
There are often children in the family of a deceased person, and they have the right to their last goodbye, too. If you are taking a child to a funeral, let them know before you go what they can expect to hear and see. This way, they’ll be less overwhelmed on the day of the end-of-life event.
8. Follow up afterwards
In the lead-up to a funeral, the family and friends are often too busy with houseguests and organising to really grieve the loss. After the funeral, people return to their normal lives, which is when the grief can often hit. Make sure you let them know you are thinking of them on an ongoing basis.
